Today’s question comes from Scott in San Francisco. Scott chatted me on Skout (natch) to ask how he could make sure he made the best impression possible on his first date. Now, I’m good, but I’m not a genie so I can’t grant wishes, but I did have some advice for Scott and thought I would share it with you.
First off, guys plan the date. It’s all well and good to act cute and helpless but honestly if you are going to ask a girl, or guy out, put some thought into what you are going to do. Have an answer for when and where you are going.
Dater: “Hey, wanna go out?”
Datee: “Yeah, totally.”
Dater: “Great, what do you want to do? ”
Datee: “Um, we could meet for coffee I guess.”
Dater: “Cool, when do you want to go?"
And the response is....crickets. That’s not a good way to get off on the right foot. Have a plan in mind, or at least act like you do, don’t leave it up to the other person after all you are the one asking for the date.
Second, and we’ve chatted about this before. Dress up. Don’t show up to go to dinner in pants dragging around your knees, butt and underwear hanging out with an old t-shirt and hoodie. Put some thought into what you are wearing and show a little effort. (Check Skoutinista’s column next week for some help in this department).
Third, be on time. If you say you are meeting at 7 show up at 6:50. There are few things worse then making your date wait, especially on the first date. Not only is it uncomfortable for your date, it is absolutely disrespectful. What, you are too important to get there on time, after you asked them out?! Be on time!
Fourth, chivalry, I talked about it last week. It is not, or should not be, dead. Sure, we are independent women who can take care of ourselves but we still like the door opened for us, or a flower given. Do something nice and be unexpected.
Last, but not least, if you want a second date-follow up! Don’t wait a week, or even the three days to say you had a good time, or you like them or you would love to go out again. Think of it this way, strike while the iron is hot! You are still fresh in their mind the next day, send a cute chat message, or, lightning bolt, leave a voice message letting them know how much fun you had.
Listen guys, it’s really the little things. They are so simple and take so little time but they really add up and go a long way. Be conscious, and put some thought into how you act and present yourself.
Just Keeping it Real-Skout Wing Gal