Someone once asked me if I had any advice on long distance relationships, to which I half-jokingly replied, “Yeah, don’t do it.” The sad reality is relationships in the same city are hard enough as is, and sometimes people who live in the same house have a hard time communicating with each other.
Nonetheless, we live in a time where meeting someone online can be more sufficient than meeting someone on the train ride home, and technology only makes it easier to have a “friend circle” that circles the globe. Unless you’re still using a pager, having some type of long-distance relationship in life – whether it be for work, friendship, or matters of the heart – is inevitable.
Skout can help start those relationships. It gives you the ability to make a new friend in Spain all from the comfort of your own home in New York. It allows you to see what’s going on in China, while you’re waiting for your laundry to dry in Seattle. Whether across the country, or right around the corner, Skout has the potential to bring people together. But while Skout helps build relationships, it’s up to YOU to keep them.
This is the part where it can get tricky. Long distance relationships can feel like an amazing vacation, or a heart-wrenching deployment. One thing is for sure; it is not for the faint of heart – or text. Fortunately, there are little things you can do that would mean a whole lot to the other person, and ultimately, the relationship.
Try to set up a weekly if not daily time for the two of you to have a Skype chat, or phone call. Being consistent shows the other person that they are a priority in your life despite not physically being there. If you have to break a date, let them know beforehand or as soon as possible afterwards. Keep them in the loop, so that you can keep them in your life. Distance can turn mountains into molehills, so not picking up your phone for 10 minutes can seem like an hour. It all boils down to trust, and communication.
Although everyone is only a Tweet, an email, or refresh button away, nothing beats physical contact. Next to nothing is comparable to hugging your brother that just got back from Afghanistan, or smelling your girlfriends hair for the first time since she moved across the country for college. Nevertheless, it’s still good to know that you can watch your best friend graduate via FaceTime, and that the cure for a boring Friday night can be found at the drop of a Wink Bomb.
Hola
LDR is possible. At least for my parent. It’s an irony when the long wait for the snail mail is what that keeps the fond heart pumping. With our current day technology, instead of having that same effect, we open ourselves to the endless flood of spams and incursion of people with the mindset out for selfish gain. Probably a good time to think, what is our objective when we hit that send button.
Kai, great insight. I think it is amazing that we live in times where we can instantly connect with people around the world – It makes for a lot of interesting and diverse conversations! But I agree that if you’re not ready for the commitment (or have the trust) for long distance, you should stick with more local relationships.
Hi today holiday ,happy all labour day .
I love my friend
I like it it better n it Easy to work
I like this love for my life
Im currently in a long distance relationship and Of course i would love to see him in person distance is merely a trst on how far love can travel. And i truely love him. He’s the one guys
Hope to find some one dating.
Totally possible!
Long distance never work , If both of you not really in to each other much . Trust me I been there and it use two to do tango . Just let flow with situation up front, if cuple had to be a part try it out at least. Not recomment for people whose sensitive and emotional . Hope this coment help
They are hard I’m soon bein moved to Washington thanks to uncle Sam while my gf is stationed in Virginia. It’s gonna be tough bit I hope we can make out work
I agree. I love this blog, it is very inspiring.
Dear chelsea, Its true about what u had posted. Just to share. My parents are also a living proof of a surviving long distance relationship, shortly after i turned 6, dad started to travel. Its hard for mum, calling him was just expensive, tickets too, and no internet that time yet. I saw my mum missing dad and I think long distance relationship I am sure, do not only only occur with couples? I had a fair share of missing dad too. I learnt that LDR is really not encouraging for family bondings. Mum said never leave ur husband alone in another country or separate with my future kids, i always told her, no way I will be with a foreigner. I am so wrong about this, opposites happen sometimes.
To be honest, I tried a long distance relationship with a french guy. I would not say it did not work out, but it only lasted for 1 year half. I was in france for a total of almost 4 months half. We had personality differences and reason of breaking up was never distance. Wounded, both heart and pocket, I struggled to move on.
Now, I am into a Dutch guy this time round. Heaven seems to be always tricking me. He is such a special guy to me, talking everyday, sometimes having debates, discussions. However, we have no committments yet. It came to a point that I became upset whenever he has doubts about long distance. I am not able to blame that innocent young man, because I think everyone has different views about it. I am a short girl, and I never knew he was such a “hot” guy because I only saw his pics much later. He became my untouchable, but yet I enjoy his company so much. After much thinking, We booked a ticket together. I am meeting him in June. Following my heart, and his?
I do not know how much he will fall for my looks or whether or not he will even give me the chance to be with him. This started to damage my self confidence a lot. But I think meeting him now this once, I tried my best and I would live without regrets. Would u do the same, if u were me? By the way, Thanks for mentioning this topic…
@Moon, Following your heart is always the truest way to go, but obviously you have to think logically as well. Long distance is sometimes very difficult, but it sounds like you are a mature and caring person and are making good decisions
Be confident!
Very well written! I hope that many people would have the same regard on on-line dating just like this one.
Hi
A relationship without sex, sounds like hell on earth
I would go far, to make sure that my significant other knows I love her. I would do anything to make her happy
Didn’t find the love of my life yet
Be patient and keep your eyes open. It will happen
I don’t share the same view as you , it’s ok wid the technology but physical presence is important , long distance is ok for a couple of months but the charm goes away quickly.
I hope ur advice nd dateing i like u
That’s true.. Nd my fiance and me are the proofs.. We met her for the first time.. Nd we got engaged in January.. I’m from Canada nd he’s an American.. We text each other all the time.. Chat on fb, Skype every night before we go to sleep.. Wake up each other by calling on Viber.. Nd though we live far, we love each other lots!
That’s really amazing, Zoey! Did you guys meet on Skout?
I would like to say you have really hit the nail in the head here. And this is not just for long distance relationships it goes for any relationship. And always remember to be honest and flattering
It’s very good for fine Friends
I’m in a long distance relationship with an American guy I met on skout. He admitted never talk to anyone who is more than 100 miles away from him but couldnt resist when he saw my pics. we’re 8000 miles apart. ldr is difficult, but we believe it’s worth the wait. I’m coming back to visit him this August
thanks for mentioning this topic Chelsea 
Awesome Cathy! Glad that Skout is connecting people around the world
Wishing you guys happiness!
Im lokin for a girfren
Me and my gf aren’t too far apart (she’s 5 mi from my dads house) but we never get time to see each other in person…I love her so much though, we do video chats every day, text when we can’t do that and…I’ve tried hugging my iPod several times >.<
Aw, that is too cute!
it’s hard when u are in a long distance realtionship because u never know what’s going on when u are in a realtionship
You guys did a wonderful job by creating apps like this, you make d world so small……..
Yeahh its hardd. My girl lives in florida while im frm boston. We txt each other everyday and try to make it work. The first time i see her will be my prom next month
Hola
Hi
Long distant relationships are hard. Especially when you know they will never end. I think besides hard work there needs to be a clear vision of how your lives will come together. My mentor once said it could be the right girl wrong time which makes it the wrong girl. Time is everything and if there is no plans to come closer then who is following who and who is getting hurt by the relationship the most?
Love knows no distance. I’m a soldier. Trust me. Especially with the technology we have today. True, physical contact is a huge factor, but love is more than that. It’s being able to draw a breath, knowing that you’re other half, whether they’re in Denmark or Denver, is breathing at the exact same time. It’s knowing there’s someone across the seas that always feels your arms around them. You can make it and relish those few moments you get that physical presence until the good lord presents the opportunity to make it an all the time thing.
LDR is so hard, unless you have enough patience and stronge believe in your lover and yourself, otherwise don’t try it, it’s really heart! :’-(
You write very well,i,m agree with u.
Thank u chelsea. I try to be confident as much as I can. But I seem to be losing it each and everyday approaching June.
help me.
Pingback: hola
I could’ve used before my boyfriend decided to break up last night. Oh well we’re still friends :/ … unfortunately :/
Yea. um no. Would be nice to find someone from another state or country, but long distance is built on trust. Now how manu ppl out there can honestly be trusted any more?? So real question is it worth it and trying it. Thats all im sayin. Trust is one main relationship to have.
I met a girl few months back here.It started with Hi and ended with bye.It was such a lovely time.we never met and we are almost 10k miles far but, with similar taste in most cases.She shared her problems and I don’t know why I cared her so much.Later we jumped on to viber and skype.We both know that its not gonna work out. still we couldn’t stop ourselves.texting all the time.Talking about various stuffs, arguments, discussions…ofcourse we ended it later.for me its a good memory and I’m happy.I have no regret!
I would like to make a point that LDR works but
its just you should have ability in believing, patience..Also sometimes your present life should support you future.we know it hurts when it fails, may be an LDR or SDR its the same.Skout helps in learning about world may be through a relationship or a friendship.You will definitely Njoy. Know how the other part of world is.Sometimes its different culture and language.!! Skout is happening
Alot of people have made very valid points. Long distance is very hard, it requires dedication, trust, love, persistence and money. I met my partner on Skype and we have been dating a while now. His from America and I live in Australia. We talk everyday and Skype at least once a week and when our timetables allow it. We have great trust and love which allows us to function as a couple from separate ends of the world. Skyping and calling can fill some of the void of not having your partner close but nothing can substitute for physical contact and the way it makes you feel. Every relationship also needs a physical component to work and this is why these type of relationships can be expensive. Travelling around the world is very expensive but worth it for the right person- i know its worth every dollar ii spend so i can see my man. if your looking at a long distance relationship you should ensure that realistic goals are made on when you will be together and were you guys see your relationship going.
That’s just some of the things I have picked up from my own relationship, hope it helps others.
itsmejohna18 i’ve been into a long distance relationship.. But then it is so hard to maintain a relationship because you haven’t seen each other yet.
I met the love of my life and Im literally willing to do anything to see him everyday and be with him yes I know it’s hard and everyday that goes by it seems like it just gets harder and harder but so far we have done it for 8 months and hopefully there will be many many more I love him so much the thing that has helped me is trust and faith without those things I’d be a mess believe me but were going to finally see each other in about a month and I’m so excited:)
Possible if both are committed and willing to accept the distant
Personally I’ve seen it work and seen it fail. This one guy I used to love, we had a LDR and I was the more committed one. We lasted a year and a half but then life became busy and I guess he started to loss importance. The same conversations, stories, and jokes were just not fun anymore. I guess I want to say is that to me I need to see LDR’s as a luxury that I can only have if I have the time to commit to it and not let my life get too carried away with them.
I LIVE IN THE UNITED STATES AND I DATED A FEMALE IN AUSTRAILIA. IT WAS GREAT THINGS GO SOUTH DO THE DISTANCE. IF YOU HAVE A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP MAKE SURE THAT THE PERSON YOU IS JUST AS DEDICATED TO THE RELATIONSHIP AS YOU ARE.THIS WHY THERE NO DISAPPOINTMENTS.
I love doing long distance relationships ! If shows me how much he loves me to come across the world just to see me ,it shows me that he dosent want sex .it shows me that he actually love me for who I am :’)
If u give the second chance,I think I do not choose the LDR,I hate the long distance ,I need a real relationship ,I Need dating with a normal guy.
Why my location appears im in korea but im in philippines.. help me how to change my location… confusing
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